Dating vs courtship christian
For many, dating is a form of entertainment, something to do with one’s free time.
It is completely possible to date someone with absolutely no intention of considering them for marriage.
Ever date for months only to find out you really don’t know the person? Then we wake up one day, in a bad relationship, or with a person who deceived us because we didn’t, properly court the situation or the person. You knew this, but you still spent time with them, had sex with them, etc. Dating looks something like this: Step 1: Meet the person (on or offline) Step 2: Get to know a few things about them, and then jump into romantic situations based on lust and infatuation Step 3: Feelings are involved but you barely know the person Step 4: You’ve probably had sex by now, or at least kissed (opening up the door for more) Step 5: You really have no idea where this is going Step 6: You still don’t know a lot about the person you’re having sex with Step 7: Feelings of fun and sexual pleasure override logic, and you forget you had a goal in mind (marriage) Step 8: You finally ask “what am I to you? ” He responds with a blank stare or curious look Step 9: You overlook step 8, and continue dating even though you both don’t see the other as marriage material or a long term GF/BF. Unfortunately, many people compromise this principle because they are unable to find enough Christian (or whatever you practice) singles to date.
Step 10: It finally dissolves because it was never meant to be in the first place Step 11: But you could have figured that out a lot sooner, had you courted Or something like that… However, we’ll never experience the same level of connection with an non-believer as we would a spiritual follower because they don’t share our values, beliefs, and/or worldview. Sex is promoted as casual and meaningless everywhere we look in our society.
I believe that we have confused courtship with dating…
Dating is what most people in the American culture do.
Talk about expectations, family, friends, finances, goals, and past experiences. You almost immediately jump into romantic situations (dinner dates)… Real hardcore conversations are rare, and intimate encounters are abundant.
As a result, the infatuation is allowed to creep in, while the intentional aspect (courting) is pushed to the side. ] OK, how many people have you dated in your lifetime knowing you wouldn’t marry them? How will they handle themselves in adverse situations?
Also, when sex is acceptable, many men use women merely for physical gratification, leaving both partners feeling empty and unsatisfied.
Some don’t want to be hurt again because of previous negative experiences.
Others don’t want to feel tied down so they keep their emotions surface-level.
But it has everything to do with both parties pursuing each other on equal playing fields, with equal investment, and equal risk.
Stop with the posts and comments about what men aren’t doing.They are two very different words, with different meanings, and indicate two different places in the process towards marriage.