After dating for two months
The main problem I have is men only being interested in me for sex or being blatantly sexual when they first approach me.
I am a very attractive black woman with a curvy body and I often feel like guys want black women for sex, particularly men of other races.
I have a degree from an Ivy level institution, am really kind and generally respectful to everyone. I think I have a great personality that matches my looks and am thinking of just deleting my profile since it’s making dating more uncomfortable and is extremely disappointing.
What can I do to show guys I’m girlfriend material and more than just a one night stand?
The idea behind telling women not to post sexy, figure-flattering photos was to avoid attracting the “wrong” kind of guy. Which is why I no longer discourage attractive women with good bodies from hiding them. Since many readers tend to lose sight of nuance, Nay, I am certainly not encouraging you to go purchase boudoir photos, wearing a negligee, ass up on the bed, your finger parting your lips. You’re accentuating your strengths in an organic way.
And I get it — on the internet, there are a LOT of “wrong” men who think nothing of writing the nastiest things from get-go. Show a photo of you and your best friend on the beach last summer.
Not quite the same as selling yourself short on the dating market. 🙂Maybe the issue for Nay lies with a recurrent pattern in the date selection process.
In terms of age, if she is in her 20’s, men may still be in their wild oats season. One such wrong message is found when some women throw a couple of pics and have zero profile contents: “hey, I look great! ” or has nothing to write, or writes nothing of interest. Maybe her expectations are ill defined (I do read profiles where women specifically state seeking an LTR, and no interest for a ONS).
Sex isn’t ALL that you are, but it should be a PIECE of who you are.So, on one hand, there is plenty of evidence that sexy photos can bring out the worst in men. Use a picture where you’re dolled up for a night out on the town.On the other hand, when forced to do a bit of soul-searching, I quickly realized something pretty important: evidently, this meant that I was one of the wrong men. Don’t be shy about something that is form-fitting or shows a hint of skin.Also, you don't want to plan anything overly romantic or too personal either.
Instead, celebrate his birthday like you would for a close friend.
If he is a bit of a thrill seeker, pay his way at an amusement park and go on the highest roller coaster you can find.